No parent is prepared for a child’s death. Parents are simply not supposed to outlive their children. It is important to remember that how long your child lived does not determine the size of your loss. The loss of a child is profound at every age. Parents of young children are intimately involved in their daily lives. Death changes every aspect of family life, often leaving an enormous emptiness.

 

 

 
When you lose a child you lose not only a child but often a close friend, a link to grandchildren, and an irreplaceable source of emotional and practical support. It felt like a dream when Enhle received a call from her son’s school to inform her that her son has passed away. When she heard the news she didn’t show emotions instantly for she was still so shocked.

When you grieve you may find that you also grieve for the hopes and dreams you had for your child, the potential that will never be realized, and the experiences you will never share.

Enhle had big dreams for her child, but I guess time was not on her side. May the little boy rest in peace. What led to his demise was not disclosed. Hopefully, Enhle will share more details when she is ready.

An out-of-order death such as child loss breaks a person (especially a parent) in a way that is not fixable or solvable. We will learn to pick up the pieces and move forward, but our lives will never be the same. Every grieving parent must find a way to continue to live with loss, and it’s a solitary journey.

Parents often count birthdays and fantasize about what their child would be like if he or she was still living. Birthdays are especially hard for them. Their hearts ache to celebrate their child’s arrival into this world, but they are left becoming intensely aware of the hole in their hearts instead.

However, since everyone grieves differently, facing the loss of a child can certainly put strain on a marriage and on each parent’s relationship with surviving children. Seek professional help when coming to terms with your loss. Don’t try to get through this situation on your own. Family counseling can give you and your family the skills you need to get through the tremendously difficult loss.