Almost a week since AKA was laid to rest and things just keep on getting worse for Nadia Nakai. The people who had surrounded and shielded her and shared the pain with her have probably gone back to their lives, leaving Nadia to wake up and deal with the reality that her partner is no longer there. All she has now are the memories that they created together.

Nadia Nakai recently took to her Instagram page to share and express how difficult it is for her without AKA. That is the issue I have with people who leave this earth. When they die, we wish them nothing but a peaceful rest and that they go to heaven. Those who are left behind will have a hard time finding that same peace. It is the hardest pain to bear.

“This pain is just too much to bare, everyone says it’s something I will learn to live with. I just don’t believe it. Every day it just gets worse. I don’t know how to deal with this. Saying it hurts doesn’t explain the level of this pain. This hole in my heart will never be filled. People go through heartache and are held together through their grief by their partners. How do I deal with the grief of losing my partner, the person that was supposed to support me is who I’ve lost? God, I miss you Kiernan”, wrote Nadia.

Nadia’s fans decided to send her more love and comfort, but, as much as we all need to be comforted, I doubt that anything Nadia hears from people or even friends will make her feel better.

According to her post, you can tell that she is still in disbelief and in the deep ends of grief, and getting out will take some time. Maybe Nadia might never fully heal because AKA will never be here again, but we wish her love and healing. May the memories that she shared with AKA bring her comfort.